We were joined at the hip, on identical paths and inseparable. 33 years of marriage and we thought NOTHING would ever separate us. We’d been through it all: heartache, triumph, birth, pain, celebration, death, achievement. Victory after victory, loss after loss. Events that would challenge our commitment to each other. We grew closer with each one. How does a couple make it through all of that and not split up? Because of their undying love for each another. Each challenge made us stronger and tighter. We prided ourselves on being unshakable, unstoppable. NOTHING would EVER pull us apart.

We were an unlikely pair. One day I fell for him and my life would never be the same. We married quickly. I recognized him as my one and only. He composed a special song for me when he proposed (he’s not even a composer). He sang the special song to me (he’s not even a singer). He played the piano while singing the special song to me (he’s not even a piano player). He was motivated to learn all of these things by love. He called the song, “Sandy.” My heart melted and I would forever be his. Ahhh, youth. Those were the days, exciting and free!

We stuck by each other’s side through thick and thin. Shared our heartaches, goals, and dreams. We grew together as one. He was my world and I was his. Endless challenges popped up, including kids. We said we would never leave each other. If we made it through all of this, NOTHING would EVER pull us apart. Our vows were unbreakable and our love was unshakable.

…UNTIL NOW.

We had stayed together for love, loyalty, and life. Then everything SHIFTED and it shifted HUGE. Things change, people grow, souls evolve. Over the last few years, we have been going in different directions and we struggled to hang on.

LOYALTY – The ego wasn’t going to let it crumble easily.

LOVE – We loved each other too much to let this masterpiece go. Just needed to work through it, find more solutions.

LIFE – We needed to live more life together, expand our experience. Ego was trying desperately to hold things together, but the Higher Self had other plans. We thought love was keeping us together, but really, LOVE WAS PULLING US APART.

What does all of this mean? Nothing in life has any meaning except the meaning we give it. My perception of love and relationship used to be one of lack. I was looking for others to love me to fill a void within myself.  My view has changed drastically. Through my new lenses, I see that splitting apart is the “Greatest Love Story of All.” It’s not the same story that began 33 years ago. That one was of romance, togetherness, and attachment. Our love story now is the one with no conditions, attachments, or obligations. The one where two people discover their truth and align with their highest vision regardless of the other. When two people no longer align in the higher vision of their truth together, it’s time to move on. Otherwise the relationship would be poisoned with lack, limitation, and resentment. We were designed this way. It’s our innate internal flow. The spiral of remembrance will teach us this.

Conscious uncoupling, that’s what this is. With an open heart and an open spirit, two people allow their hearts to move gently apart. They honor each other completely and allow the pure resonance of their intentions to align in Oneness. It can only be done with pure, genuine, unconditional love. There is awareness, and truth, and dignity. There need be no resentment or guilt. Sadness naturally arises as the ego grieves its masterpiece. Tears fall at the loss of identity. Tears are the authentic expression of the soul and are to be honored in a breakup; however, they are to be funneled through with full trust of moving forward. Two hearts break and one heart falls. Our hearts fall together in Oneness. That’s the beauty. We’ll always be connected, we’ll always be in Oneness, just with a new, independent energetic alignment. It takes a lot of courage, strength, and trust to understand and choose this path.

I realized the Greatest Love of all is really the greatest love for myself. I struggled to find love in my youth. I thought it was outside of myself, so I was forever searching… and hubby filled that void, for a long while. Now it is complete within myself. I have full unconditional love for myself, and I’m free to explore my journey in the most optimal way. This brings to mind the words to one of my favorite songs, “Greatest Love of All” by Whitney Houston. This is my beautiful tune…

“I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone’s shadows
If I fail, if I succeed, at least I’ll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me, they can’t take away my dignity

Because the greatest love of all is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all inside of me
The greatest love of all is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all”

What a heavy weight lifted! No attachments, no obligations to each other. No trying to hold things together or control the outcome. Let it be. There are no words to describe this form of freedom. It’s COMPLETE DELIVERANCE from bondage and burdens. I have never felt this way before EVER in this lifetime. I hope you can experience it, too, in whatever form it takes for you!

What is the lesson here? That the “Greatest Love” is unconditional; it is the love of ONESELF. If it’s truly unconditional, you can let someone go purely, exclusively, respectfully, so they can explore their journey apart from you. I no longer need him to fill a void, because there is no void. I unconditionally walk away. No strings attached. I am forever changed and I have expanded beyond my former self. I am so much more than this relationship and this persona. I am pure consciousness embodied as Sandy Vaught Anthony. As consciousness, I am aware of myself in physical form. I am free to be someone else. I am free to grow and expand beyond my wildest dreams. Perhaps the biggest misperception is that this is a loss. IT IS ACTUALLY A GAIN. I still have my beautiful memories. I am not judging my creation. My love is forever, and the memories with him are forever. I am immensely grateful for the rich lessons I have experienced. In fact, writing this blog is helping me with embracing and completing this cycle.

I am enough.

I’M THE ONE I’VE BEEN LOOKING FOR ALL ALONG. Time to move forward in full bloom. I am a beautiful rose twisting and twining out of the soil, allowing her blossoms to take full form. Artistry in motion and master of emotion. As the petals fall, they dance and swirl, and a new birth takes place. This reminds me of another one of my favorite songs called “The Rose” by Bette Midler. I performed a solo lyrical dance to this song years ago and it still has relevance for me today. This is exactly how I feel! Its timeless message activates the seeds of the higher heart. Feel into it.

“Some say love, it is a river, that drowns the tender reed
Some say love, it is a razor, that leaves your soul to bleed
Some say love, it is a hunger, an endless aching need
I say love, it is a flower, and you, its only seed

Its the heart afraid of breaking, that never learns to dance
Its the dream afraid of waking, that never takes the chance
It’s the one who won’t be taking, who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying, that never learns to live

When the night has been too lonely and the road has been too long
And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed, that with the sun’s love in the spring becomes the rose.”

I AM the rose. 

Sandy Anthony
Trinity Energy Progression Facilitator/Practitioner