A few years back I had a vivid dream. Though it wasn’t lucid, I had a moment when I knew I was dreaming and realized I was somewhere “real.” I floated in a plasma like atmosphere. It was quiet. Filtering through the space, a soft light glowed around the edges of shapes and from the colors of the “atmosphere.”
The planes of the ground, horizon and sky all vibrated iridescent of purple, blue-magenta and some red-pink tones. There were shapes that looked like rocks. Other objects that painted the landscape but I do not recall and of course I did not think to write it down after the dream occurred. I thought at the time that it was such a vivid and life transforming experience that I would remember all the details.
While those details have faded, I’m left with awestruck feeling of being somewhere out of this world. I felt as if I were Hubble’s telescope, where the lens would view. In the dream, I thought that I had arrived at this place by traveling outward and going ‘up’ high and great distance away. I thought of the location like, if one left Earth, this place would be way out in the galaxy somewhere. That is the impression I have had all along until a few days ago.
Dreams can be attention getters. They have that essence of familiarity from this existence, however small, but hyperbolized, painted with sparkles and consist of super-hero like attributes. On top of that a hefty handful of quantum stew elements, marinated in all the effects that Hollywood, Disney, NASA, and Tesla combined could possibly muster, set the stage for our dreams.
While in a vivid dream state, it may seem like, yes, this is the way it is, this is truth. But coming back and waking up and revisiting it with the 3D lens, it makes no sense. It is magical, mystical, and hopeful, but as well is also confusing and leaves one in a state of understanding that there is so much more to ALL of this that must be explored.
But back to a few days ago, when the where that I was, was turned inside out. For some reason, I am on a super-hero kick as I am watching Netflix and clicking on the “Guardians of the Galaxy,” “The Avengers,” and “Ant-Man and the Wasp.” Ant-Man is unique in that he can get very, very small. Quantum level small. A small world he collapsed into was déjà vu to the vivid dream I described earlier.
Upon seeing this and connecting it to that dream, a knowing bell rang inside of me. It occurred to me that my assumption of going out and far may not have been so. When in deep water, up and down can easily get confused. Balance and equilibrium can feel off and we become challenged to orient ourselves. It seems possible that traveling outward and inward have that same phenomena. I may not have gone out to Hubble’s eyesight at all, but instead traveled inwards with the lens of a quantum microscope.
In a sense, that feels right. My sense of orientation was off, and I was inward and at the beginning. I was at the place of the building blocks and the source of all things, where it’s all connected and tangled to all that is. It is a place to go to make adjustments when things run amok on this larger than life stage. Whether it be a health issue, or a seemingly out of control situation, or an engine on the fritz, this is THE PLACE to be to fine tune at the core and heal and resolve.
The greatest part of this whole exploration, is that it came around full circle to home, where we’ve all been and where we go often when meditating or tapping into healing practices like Trinity. I cannot wait to go back in with all senses and more. Now I remember how once again. It is a funny sort of remembering to remember, remember: We’re almost there, remembering this kind of thing.
Speaking of remembering, where I’m going with all of this is a reminder to us. A reminder to take the time to practice going within and connecting to all there is. Figuratively intend to pull some weeds and plant some trees and hug one while you’re there at the root source, so that love and good continues to be reflected up high and all over the place near and far. It is all connected. It’s all good. We are love and all that jazz.
Fasting, releasing, letting go, removing blocks which prevent our light to shine, removing masks and discarding our shadow lives and being in full bloom to show up as authentic self. If I were unafraid, I would let go of all my masks, all props, costumes, scripts, all ego created beliefs and BE.
I am pondering why I have created such a tight grip to holding onto the show. Even though I know that letting go leads to something a whole lot better than my ego can imagine, I still resist and I hold back. I am watching this tennis match between my ego and a wall. Watching and believing that my ego can champion over a wall. A wall which only is the reflective action the ego imposes upon it. Yet even knowing that this is not real, I am holding onto it as if it is. There is still so much resistance upon letting go.
I want so much to remember, remember my true authentic being. My prayers, meditations, readings, writings, healings, and thoughts all focus on this. I remind myself daily or more often than that to “wake up” … to “remember” … to “let go and trust” … and to “be in faith”. Some moments, many moments, my patience turns and annoyance and aggravation become me and questions of doubt and uncertainty pour out. The questions spill, “why can’t I just wake up, why is this taking so long, what the heck” and so on and so forth. Then snap, my mind pivots and I attend to “it is time to refocus, time to heal, time to sit with that and reveal what the hold up within myself is.”
An answer bubbles up to the surface and shows that I am in grief and misery and terribly miss knowing that I will forget all this. When I wake up and step into my truth and being that I am, I will have no memory at all of this dream world of this enchanted, exotic, wild, exciting, ego trip that I have been experiencing since the apple was eaten and this hallucination begun. That I hold onto. I hold onto wanting to remember this and that. Something tells me that both cannot be remembered. It feels like something of the flavor of “we cannot serve two masters.” I am torn, as I know it is time to step into the fullness and all that I am, but darn it all I do not want to forget this wild story. My sentimentality and love for this imagined creation is still strongly entrenched in my being. I am hitting the snooze bar for 5 more minutes, I am enjoying this dream.
Along comes the siren with a lullaby and it sweetly sings that it does not have to be all or none, not right away. This is a finely tuned web of beliefs after all; and here negotiating, the ego is at work and says, “you know you can have your cake and eat it too.” But of course we can stall. We can take an evolutionary step and yet still be present with this 3D dream. The drum rolls, and the reveal is that we can BE AWAKE within the dream. Interesting, this is a precarious position for the ego. I am surprised it is willing to take a step in this presence. For the ego, this is like standing on the ledge of a cliff and all of a sudden the other side of the earth falls away leaving the ego balancing itself on a pinnacle of land for support without much leeway or wiggle room for roaming or moving about. It looks bleak for the ego now with nowhere left to go. It is reduced to its final frontier and left to dissolve into I…..
I am afraid to let my imaginary friend go is what it boils to, and in irony it is my imaginary friend who is afraid to be imagined, to be let go, as my imagined sense is making this so. It is confusing to be insane. It is now time to let go of the insanity within. Know now it is time to turn within and connect to source and release and heal and receive the Truth of that in which we are.
Peace and Love to all. See ya on the other side where though there is no word for it, I believe it points way beyond awesomenesssss!
Facilitator, Trinity Energy Progression™