Trepidation or Trust?

TrepidationTrustI recently woke up with the word trepidation in my head and thoughts.

Trepidation – Noun:  a feeling of fear or agitation about something that may happen:

Trust – Noun:  confident expectation of something

I realized trepidation has been an enormous word in my life. It has so many connections to so many things going on. I recently had to go to Florida to have my Mom tested for declining mental capacity. It was a daunting task and I was really worried about the outcome. Then it occurred to me that there were a lot of situations in my life that this also applies to.

My spiritual journey
My personal life
My financial situation
All of the unknowns I tend to worry about

All of these situations have had trepidation involved for me. I can say that all of the self-work and my spiritual journey have made things a lot less troublesome and scary in my life. I have been opening myself up to Trust and it has become an even more amazing journey.

I have been drawn, pushed or shoved – not always by choice – to take classes even when I did not know why or what I would do after taking them. Afterward, I’ve had issues with why I did and what I should be doing with them, not meeting expectations of whomever (mostly myself). I’ve come to realize over the last year or so, with help and gentle guidance from several soul family members and spiritual guides, to try not to have expectations of what I should be doing but rather take in all of the tools I have been gifted and move myself further on my journey. To Trust!!! I feel that each class I have taken and every person with whom I have come in contact along this journey has been instrumental in opening doors that I didn’t even know existed. Even though I currently don’t practice on others or teach any of the modalities I’ve learned over the last several years, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t benefited or grown from them. Not sure where this journey will lead me next… but I’m certain it will be even more amazing than it already is!

I am learning to trust myself in ways that I never thought I would. It has been a slow process but I’m gaining confidence. Letting go of my story has been one of the biggest stumbling blocks, and I have worked very consistently to get past it all. Still have a ways to go, but I’m gaining personal and spiritual growth and trust along the way.  This spiritual journey has been amazing, and I’ve begun to allow it to steer me in the direction I am supposed to go. I am happier now than I have been in a very long time! A lot less trepidation…and a lot more trust in my life.

Before leaving for Florida, I put together a creation statement for my mom, my family and myself – if all of the higher selves will accept it, “that everything comes together for my Mom and my family in the way it is supposed to be in the easiest and best way for all and that all of the issues that my family will face also be for our highest and best with grace and ease, love and harmony…” I meditated, sent unconditional love to myself and to all involved. My thoughts then were that everything would be okay and will unfold as they should with grace and ease and harmony and love and joy, without distress and pain to any of us. With this process I moved from trepidation to trust. I allowed myself to trust. The outcome has been amazing.

With love and trust may we all continue to move forward with our Journeys.










Bonnie Butler
Trinity Energy Progression Facilitator/Practitioner

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