We have definitely shifted into a different space. The trip I took to Mt. Shasta in September was so powerful that I haven’t been able to fully return into my former home reality. I no longer feel like there is a specific place that I can call home. I keep longing for something that I can’t put my finger on. I have this feeling I should move, but every time I think I’ve found a place that would be good, it doesn’t feel right and the search begins again. There doesn’t seem to be a place that captures what I’m feeling inside.
In addition, I’ve been faced with issues that I thought I had worked out. Feelings of victimization, self-loathing, abandonment, loneliness, judgment, not being heard, fear of confrontation, feelings of self- sacrifice, self-judgment, feelings of worthlessness. Heavy stuff, things that I didn’t realize were still profoundly affecting me. I mean, how much of this do I have inside? It feels insurmountable at times. I have been brought to my knees AGAIN. Almost every relationship showing me things to shift, but yet are so challenging to face. The relationship with my parents and siblings is at the moment the one that has been mirroring issues for me the most. I knew that I had been changed forever when in Shasta but I had underestimated how much. I really thought that I could come home, take a couple of weeks to re-acclimate and go back to my routine life. But that isn’t the case! There is no such thing as “going back to routine.” That time has passed, and I am writing this so that all who read this can find comfort in the fact that so many of us are currently feeling the same way. Everyone I’ve spoken with has a similar story. We are all being pushed so hard to step into our full Divinity, our Truth. So many mirrors being put up so that we don’t stop moving forward. The Universe is no longer waiting around! It’s been doing this for some time, I know, but I feel we’ve gone into warp speed over the last couple of months. When I can finally get my head above water, out of all those feelings of separation, I can see all of it from a higher perspective. In those moments of clarity… my goodness, how beautiful and perfect it all is!
It’s only when I get out of mind and sit in the vibration of Love, the vibration that is ME, that I get the clarity. That’s when I get the peace. Although, I have to say, those times have been few and far between. There are many days, moments within the day that I have to constantly remind myself to allow and flow, and man, that has been really hard to do! Ego is holding on with a death grip! It’s been a challenging time fighting it. The thought of just going back to the way I was would be so much easier… but that isn’t an option, because the feelings of being stagnant are even more terrifying than the self work, which I know will end in something wonderful.
The perfection is that all of the things that I am being shown are exactly what’s standing in my way of true self-love, and it is only through this that we will be able to do what we came here to do. It’s only when we get through every last thing that gets in the way of loving ourselves completely as the perfect Divine beings we are, that we’ll be able to go forward without fear or doubt or anything and be exactly what we were created to be, pure Love. Love that knows no boundaries. Love that encompasses all. Love that is our Oneness. Love that needs no words, or thoughts, or physicality. Love that will just Be, Be the Divine that we already are but we can’t yet see because of all the blinders we’ve put up. They are falling away. This is what we are all being pushed to realize. Because there is no work to do really; that’s just an illusion. Everything we are being shown for us to shift are just messages to ourselves, reminders, the bread crumbs we have left so we can find our way back. All of it so we can remember WE ARE already all of it. We are the Divine. We are Perfect. We are ALL.
I hear it all the time…outside of space and time. Indicating that if you can’t be present at the appointed time, you still can achieve the same results. But I have never really thought about what it means other than whenever it works for me in my timeline. But that still involves time. And I think about connecting to whatever is outside of space and time, so in my mind that still involves space. What truly is outside of space and time? I see removing time and space from my life leaving me with only vibration. Universal, Eternal, Being. No limits, conditions or judgments. Actually not even words.
As I move towards living knowing that I am everything and that the Universes within me go as far in as the Universes outside of me go out, everything is up for redefinition. And what better place to begin that process than with myself? How do I meet myself? I begin outside of space and time and the obvious answer is in pure love. And since there is no space and time, what does that vibration feel like? It is the vibration of me at my core level. The Me I always have been for eons even before space and time. Me as pure potential. Me as Love. True self love. Pure, simple and powerful.
Redefining myself as this vibration brings about the crumbling of all aspects of me that are no longer supported in this vibration. How freeing?! What an opportunity?! And chaos!! I find that staying outside of space and time as well as trusting my vibration is crucial to allow this rebirthing to occur. Those aspects of my life and me that are in harmony with my vibration are magnified and attract other like vibrations. Easily. And those that aren’t fall away and disappear. Easily, all based on self-love outside of space and time.
I also trust that everything that is in my life has meaning or a message for me. Created and sent by me. I listen and feel into the vibration of it and allow it to align with my self-love or not and fall away. It is a new way of moving through space and time. My new way of Being, living and honoring my unique vibration within the symphony of the Multiverse.
Living Self-Love outside of space and time within space and time.
Before we move into the topic at hand, and before you read on, take a deep breath… close your eyes… and allow yourself to FEEL.
Do you feel that?
It was only a few moments, and yet, as soon as I asked the question above, chances are your mind/ego did one of two things:
It asked, “Did I feel what?” AND/OR
It said, “Yes… I feel _____________.”
Getting Beyond Limiting Constructs
As we continually increase our remembrance and expand our consciousness, regardless of how far along “on the spiritual path” one may be, typically there is STILL some form of “analysis paralysis” – some effort to define and put constructs around every experience. At this level of consciousness, while we allow for this physical density and separation – where we forget all of this is an illusion, that we’re infinite, Divine beings, and of the same multiversal consciousness – we often overlook one of the most basic and yet most powerful fundamentals: that words and constructs of all kinds (including time and space) are our creation and born in this experience of boxes and limitations.
However, there is a commonality that exists across the Multiverse – or rather, that has by and large constructed the Multiverse – and that’s frequency.
As I understand it, frequency is basically a consciousness construct we created from the Void, in essence creating a blueprint for this entire Multiverse. We could get into a debate over whether energy came first, existed always, or whether we actually created energy from the Void’s construct of frequency… but there we go, with the mind again!
Everything as we know it, as we discover/remember across the Multiverse, has some sort of energetic frequency or vibration. In essence, everything – EVERYTHING – manifests and exists starting from the frequency at which it was created.
Even astronomers have realized that planets and moons we’ve studied exist in various vibrations. In fact, there have been videos going around via YouTube that are “sound translations” to auralize these frequencies so we can hear/perceive them in our bodies (if you’ve never listened to any of them,here’s one that does Earth and other planets/moons in our solar system).
The Music of the Spheres
In metaphysics, there’s something called Music of the Spheres that runs along this understanding: Everything in this multiverse has a frequency at which it exists, and that this uber-complex Multiverse is essentially the equivalent of one, big colossal Divine symphony. If you’ve not previously consciously heard the Music of the Spheres, go out into the Divine Consciousness – or just go out into meditation, into the silent void – and ask to remember the Music of the Spheres. It’s a phenomenal experience… because in consciously doing so, one begins to remember how to feel the exact “note” they are as part of the whole. It’s a great bedtime activity, because once I “tune in”… I just melt away, forgetting my individuation in the symphony…
We’ve created music and tones to try to replicate this here; however, with our dense, limited physical bodies (specifically the physical makeup of our ears), we only have a tiny fraction of ability to physically access a limited range of tones aurally. This includes words, sounds (as we know them) as well as music and tones.
Thus… “listening” is still a construct created by the construct of our physical bodies… limitations from limitations from limitations. It’s time to turn our attention to FEEL beyond the physical, beyond our definition of reference from the physical; to remembering our BEING a part of the symphony in KNOWING.
Frequency as Consciousness
I was recently on my annual jaunt to Mount Shasta, CA – an energetic “home” and vortex – teaching the Trinity Energy Progression Instructor class and then holding a retreat for existing instructors afterward. Every year, I build in an evening during class to do a crystal bowl event at a local crystal store in town, The Crystal Room. Bev, our enchantress, has an entire room in the back of the store with a huge variety of these amazing, uber high vibe crystal bowls. She does a phenomenal job at walking groups through allowing the consciousness of the crystal bowls to play the physicality of our bodies. It’s an amazing experience; the more conscious one becomes, the more one begins to understand the “language of the bowls” as frequencies – much, much more than sounds – frolicking and intermingling with our physicality. It’s amazing… and the more one is aware and allows themselves to be beyond words, the more one sinks into the experience, beyond what’s heard.
Heather Smothers, one of this year’s Instructor class students, purchased one of these beings after our experience together in Mount Shasta. If you click on the audio link below, you’ll experience a brief audio/video of her playing this bowl. Before you click on the play button, do what we did in the beginning: Take a deep breath, then close your eyes, and now REALLY allow yourself to FEEL free of definition. You can do it with headphones on… you can put your hand on the speaker… you can just allow the frequencies to intermingle with you. |
This year, after the second night I sat through the crystal bowl event, the bowls came to “talk” to me in my sleep… and I understood them! No words or even sounds… just frequency. Yowsah… talk about powerful – and completely wordless AND thoughtless – communication!
The Relation to “Light Language”
What’s come to the surface for many most recently is the re-surgence of “Light Language” – the definition of which depends on who you ask. I’ve had quite a number of experiences, dreams, and meditations with Light Language being the method of communication… and until recently, if I tried to THINK about it… I’d draw a blank. It was when I was shown how to remember not too long ago, in a meditation, that Light Language is pure FREQUENCY, and all individuations in the Multiverse would have their own “Light Language” as we’re trying to define (and translate), that I began to recognize how to connect and understand that way.
It’s pure frequency; closest to our 100% natural state of consciousness in the Wholeness/Oneness, and it’s completely from love.
The key here is… there is and won’t be any “Rosetta Stone” for “Light Language”… because it’s different for every individual; it’s actually WITHIN. And frequency is all interconnected… so once we remember how to simply EXIST as love frequency, we connect together, to each other and to all consciousness everywhere, No words. No definitions. No “analysis paralysis”… and straight into BEing.
Transforming Forward… Living Frequency
There’s a LOT to experience around this! Whatever your individual spiritual practice, what’s most important right now is regularly accessing that BEingness free of words, free of definitions, free of analysis and explanation. It’s from there the true connection begins… and we LIVE frequency!
This year, I wrestled with the thought of getting older the weeks before my birthday, freaking myself out for a little bit! I ask myself now, what was that all about? I’m still here, the same person I was yesterday, but with a renewed sense of purpose.I am still experiencing life fully, I love myself, I am able to learn new things, and life is exciting. I have so much to be grateful for!
We place so much value on age and being “forever young.” It’s not about our age, it’s how we feel within! I (literally) “tripped myself up”… I fell in a hole off the sidewalk while outside walking a few days after my birthday. I felt handicapped, not being able to move around freely and pain free. However, it gave me the time and a chance to look at my life and see that there is always something new to learn, to love myself and be grateful for, at any age or place in my life. For ALL of us, it’s never too late to change directions or to learn something new… including something you might have been putting off or on hold for a long time, because you kept yourself too busy to look at new possibilities and chances.
Where in your life are you out of balance or harmony? Where do you feel stuck, inflexible and undervalued? Do you need a change in direction? Is change difficult for you? Do you feel guilty in experiencing joy and pleasure?
What gives your life purpose and direction? What is preventing you from moving forward? Are you present in the moment?
Make a decision and start moving forward towards the new goal, even if it is baby steps, one step at a time.
My new mantra is:
I step forward in life with joy, grace and ease, balance and harmony.
I am willing to change with the times. I accept and give thanks to all the pleasures life has to offer.
And so it is!
Here is a little poem that came to me:
Love is pure.
Love is true.
Love is forever.
Love is unconditional.
Love does not depend on age, looks, money,
Jobs, status, loneliness or
fulfillment of expectations…
your own or others.
Not wanting to look deeply at
ourselves in the mirror,
our own perceived lack,
our “needs and wants” to fill that hole within.
We are whole already.
Love starts within. With full acceptance of ourselves.
Being happy with who we are, even if we believe we are not perfect.
We are perfect in God’s eyes, here to learn and Love.
We are divine beings connected to all there is.
We are Love!
This year has been an amazing year for me. I have done so much as far as travel and friendships. I’ve been to some amazing places and spent time with some amazing people. I got to see the Aurora Borealis aka Northern Lights in Iceland in January. I also visited a small fishing village on the Baltic Sea with a Church that is more than 1100 years old in April. Both of these events were awe inspiring. They did leave me pausing and thinking about my purpose and place in this universe. I also have traveled to a lot of places in the US. It seems that I have been away from home almost every weekend this year. I have made some wonderful new friends and visited very dear family and friends during my travels.
But, it seemed that something was amiss during all of this amazing time in my life. I’ve had some personal issues come back up again and found myself starting to go down some dark places that my mind used to enjoy visiting in the past. This has been going on for a while but I kept trying to move past it. I was not having a lot of success and was traveling deeper into those dark places.
I finally realized what was happening. The ego likes to play tricks and makes it difficult at times to recognize our state of affairs. The old feels safe so we don’t always realize it right away. I had slowed down on working on my spiritual self. So, I started doing a lot of self work again. Recently after a meditation one night as I was falling asleep this is what came to me with a bang. It was like a bright light and very loud voice – “our thoughts create our reality”. Of course, I already knew this but when we start sliding away from our spiritual selves and what we already know its importance diminishes. I needed to start thinking positive thoughts that will move me forward and need to create visions of what I want in my life again. That is what got me to where I am – knowing, trusting and believing that the Universe will take care of everything. DUH!!!!!
I fell asleep after my revelation seeing my life being the way I want it to be. There is so much to be grateful for and there is so much I can change in my life by seeing things the way I want them to be. I am working constantly to not allow myself to travel down those dark roads that I sometimes travel. And when something does come up I immediately find the thought of what I want the situation to be in a positive way instead of the negative places my mind likes to stroll at times. My life and attitude has improved beyond my own expectations since this realization.
Follow your Spiritual guidance and the Universe will take care of you. Live your dreams. We are all a work in progress and we are all Spiritual beings in a 3D presence.
We just need to remember what we already know. It is so simple but so difficult at times.
Namaste!
Bonnie Butler Trinity Energy Progression Facilitator/Practitioner