I am a dog person and have loved having dogs as pets since I was a child. They are always ready and waiting with wagging tails to be petted. I used to have a lot of peeves as pets, too, that were also always ready and waiting for me to pet them — anywhere, anytime! And they were an ever growing pack of peeves. I remember often saying: “That is one of my pet peeves.”

My peeves were there for me to pet in the car while I was driving. For example:

• Tailgaters when you’re going faster than the speed limit, or those really slow drivers in the fast lane;
• Turn signals on the car in front of you staying on FOREVER (or drivers who don’t use a turn signal at all);
• Litterers who throw trash from their car window as they drive.

My peeves were with me when I went to the movies and restaurants and shopping:

• Squashed cigarette butts outside of entry doors into a building (because no smoking allowed inside??);
• Parents bringing their pre-schoolers to R-rated movies (because they are too young to understand??);
• People repeatedly hitting the elevator button (to make the elevator arrive sooner??);
• Making a sucking noise with a straw to get that very last drop (or all those drops after the very last drop??);
• Drivers parking their cars across 2 parking spaces (for those needing more personal space for their beloved vehicle??);
• Wobbly tables at restaurants (to keep you moving until you leave??);
• Movie talkers, or super noisy eaters during a movie (food, friends, entertainment – what a great socializing opportunity??).

Of course, they lived with me at home, too:

• Coming home to a house smelling like trash that should have been taken out yesterday;
• A topless toothpaste tube now full of dried toothpaste;
• No extra roll of toilet paper in the bathroom;
• An empty carton in the refrigerator…

I’ll stop this particular list now as I do live by myself 🙂
As Trinity Energy Progression became more and more a part of my life, I began to ask myself what was I willing or able to do to actually stop these pesky peeves from being my constant companions. I could never see myself actually hurling an angry admonition into a movie theater audience for someone a few rows away to eat more quietly or to stop their endless talking. But that is exactly what I was doing in my head as I succumbed to the peeves’ demands to be petted without it having any effect on actually stopping their unwanted behavior.

Peeve petting was an instantaneous way to annoy myself without really trying by just looking around me. I rarely missed an opportunity to pick up stray peeves. There were so many of them that were just begging to be petted, ALL the time! Through my Trinity practice, I began to explore why I would ever want to annoy myself with this and why I continued to pick up even more peeves to pet. I realized how petting peeves could obsess me to the extent that they would become a primary focus and distraction, with me often sharing my thoughts about the annoying peeve with whomever was within earshot. I see the peeves as my ego’s pets; my ego loves this “petting.” My ego also loves “peeving” contests where “my peeve is better than yours” or having more peeves than someone else, as well as the superiority my ego feels by only petting the peeve rather than being the peeve.

Now, when I see a peeve looming in front of me or when someone comments that something is a pet peeve of theirs, my head fills with laughter at the thought of a peeve as my pet nipping at my heels and barking incessantly to get my attention so I will pet it. With the focus of Trinity Energy Progression on unconditional love and joy, I couldn’t help but see how my dogs as pets have always been “adorable bundles” (in various sizes) of unconditional love and joy. Although peeves come in many shapes and sizes as well, I see them all as rather “unadorable bundles” of judgment and negativity. I see petting them as expressions of this negativity and judgment by me as the peeve petter.

These days, I laugh at myself at even the idea of choosing to be a peeve petter instead of enjoying petting my unconditionally loving tail-wagging dog. Trinity Energy Progression has helped me remember to choose this simple joy instead of petting peeves. With a smile on my face, I am now going to pet my dog!

Sandi Newton
Trinity Energy Progression Facilitator/Practitioner